Liberated from Permanence

Every wakeful moment has been tormented with angst.

Struggling to simply keep abreast.

Beneath my skin are layers of pain and confusion.

I am drowning deep into despair.

Far reaching the ocean’s abyss.

My heart broken.

Crushed.

Stomped.

Chewed up and spit out with no consequence to you.

What can I do? I do not know.

I believe it to be ok not to know.

Permanence is not promised to me.

Am I purely light and joy?

No.

I am my dark shadow in this moment.

A shadow that is refusing to hide itself.

It is dominating me.

Overwhelming and suffocating.

Endless joy is not promised to me.

Leaning into you.

Embracing you.

I refuse to hide from my darkness.

It receives me with compassion and a kind curiosity.

Whispering to me that this too is temporary.

I am not alone.

Truth extends its hand.

Hold tight.

Telling me this is a part of my journey.

It is beautiful and promising.

Full of hope and love.

A calling to renounce all which does not serve my highest self.

Let go… let go… let go… let go…

I am alive with every emotion, feeling, and thought.

Liberated from permanence.